COUNTDOWN
Graduation 6/9/13
4 days
18th Birthday 6/15/13
10 days
California 6/20/13
15 days
Relay For Life 7/13/13
37 days
Graduation Party 7/14/13
38 days
MOVE IN DAY 8/22/13
77 days
Why my self esteem sucks.
I just realized this today, although its kinda been lingering around in my mind for awhile. It’s because for 6 years of grade school I was put down and picked on by my classmates. I guess I started the whole “go along with it and make fun of myself” thing to get them to stop laughing at me and laugh with me. Although they really were just laughing at me. So I guess as years passed, I started putting myself down to get a chuckle out of people because thats what I figured they were thinking anyways. After a while I started believing everything they said and I said to be true. I don’t like feeling stupid so that must be why when someone says I can’t do something I agree with them. So they can’t say “I told you so” when in reality I should just tell them to ef off and let me do what I want. I don’t know if I’ll ever truly get my self esteem up. I mean I’ll try but it’s all easier said then done. But you know all along I never realized what a huge impact bullying had on my life. It psychologically messed me up. Who knows where I’d be at now if I would of just had so damn confidence.
